Friday, August 19, 2011

Amber's guide to becoming a successful music group

For those of you who ever thought of starting a band follow these simple rules:




1. You need at least five members: Three of them sing background and the other two are the leads.

2. One of the lead singers has to be an arrogant, selfish asshole

3. One of your members has to be a drug addict (coke preferred)

4. YOU MUST HAVE AN UGLY MEMBER SO THAT THE OTHER MEMBERS LOOK SEXUALLY APPEALING

5. You must have a member thats in the background so much that you wouldn't even know he was in the group.

6. Always betray your group members. REMEMBER its always about you. That way the group can break up and have a kick ass reunion concert.

7. If rule number 6 doesnt work start your own solo record. This only applys to the two lead singers. if your not a lead singer than you will either be completely forgotten and bankrupt, become extremely religious and make christian rock, or you will start an extremely low budget campaign to stop AIDS.

8. Attend as many sex and coke parties as possible.

9. NEVER sign deals with Pdiddy and bad boy records, he likes to be on everyones shit.

10. When one of your members dies ( dont kid yourself this will happen, more than likely it will be the coke addict) create a high budget rated R biography movie with actors that show absolutely no resemblence to the actual person.

11. The group breaks up after having only a year of success. 6 months if you signed with Pdiddy.



This has been Amber's guide to being a successful music good luck : D

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